Developing one’s personality
A man once asked Nietzsche, “How can one develop one’s personality?” And Nietzsche replied, “By living dangerously.”
I read this anecdote many years back and instantly fell in love with it. At that point I truly believed I was living dangerously. And what could be better than developing one’s personality while at it! We (my friends and I) had gone on several treacherous treks and come close to meeting our maker earlier than intended more than once. We used to race our Enfields at 100+kph for several kms at a stretch on India’s famously unpredictable roads where a holy cow or the ubiquitous pothole could accelerate your trip down the highway to hell. We would venture deep into forests supposedly infested with cheetahs and wild boars, and spend the night in the open, bragging of meeting the wild ones head-on, while being on the verge of peeing in our pants at the slightest rustling of leaves.
While we continued in our delusions, here was a famous philosopher telling me I might actually be developing my personality in the bargain. Now, all these years later, I feel Nietzsche might have been right after all. I really don’t know whether engaging in adrenaline inducing activities will contribute to developing my personality or not. And I don’t think that’s what Nietzsche probably had in mind when he made that statement. So how can a regular guy leading a regular life mature into a person he can be proud of?
Well, in retrospect, the few times I have felt good about myself as a person have been those moments when I stuck to a decision I thought was right, or supported a person I felt was in the right, in spite of the possibility of antagonizing almost everyone in my group, whose approval or validation I did care about at that point in time. During our growing up years, and even during adulthood, acceptance by the society at large or by our peer group is important to most of us. In some ways they define who we are – they influence our tastes, the activities we engage in for entertainment, our general attitude towards life, etc etc. So going against the stand they want you to take could result in being ostracized, i.e. social death. This, I now feel, is what true dangerous living is all about.
Nevertheless, the few times I took such a stance, I would feel a positive development within me. I would experience an ecstatic sense of freedom, of light seeping into my soul, a blemish from my soul being burnt away with fine-cutting laser beams, and my spirit being rewired to emit the new positive energy.
It’s easy to follow the crowd. Nothing wrong with that either. But when you suppress your instinct for what is right, when you don’t stand up for someone you know is speaking the truth, when you choose the easy way out as you don’t want to incur the collective wrath of the “group”, or even worse, when you join or even take the lead in demolishing the character or kindheartedness of a fellow human being for the sole purpose of gaining the approval of the “group” then you have caused irreparable damage to your psyche. You did it to belong, to feel good! But do you really feel great?
Away from the crowd, when you are back to being on your own, why does the bile rise to your throat? Why do you feel so worthless? Just like a puff of the cigarette that gives you a high for a few minutes but weakens you mentally and physically all the days of your addiction, in the same way, your need to be in the limelight for those two minutes has depraved your soul.
Accept the risk; stand for the truth, live dangerously! And grow as a person. The eternal future of your soul demands it of you. Your creator demands it of you. It’s easy to succumb to the easy life. But then who ever said it was supposed to be easy. That’s why it’s called living dangerously!
